Be all you can be

Be all you can be

Many, many thanks for sharing. You are safe with me. VAW (Geeze) is the second woman who has turned on me. I have refused to do the same to her, just as I refused to do the same to the first woman, about 9 nine years ago. I practiced silence. And then Geeze called me a coward for not talking to her. How could I, how should I? I wouldn't even know how to address her, now my contempt for her is so deep. I think, in anger and by extreme reactions, we degraded ourselves by bad language and bad actions. It would be best if we just moved on in silence. There was nothing to talk about anymore. All the misunderstandings, the failures of comprehending who the other was, the blames, the threats, the insults, they were all very ugly ways to convey contempt. The best way to show contempt is silence. 

Yes, use your judgment and intuition. Be fearless. Be kind. And be patient. I do warn you and all the women out there who care to listen: to really know me is to fall in love with me. That's a fact, and not an empty boast. If I don't, won't, can't reciprocate the feelings, please don't react like Geeze and, to a lesser extent, Louise did. That won't be cool. Rejection happens all the time in life. I have been rejected so many times, I stop counting. I have been rejected in romantic, in business, in friendship, dealings. Rejection is part of life. Nobody walks away from a good deal. So if rejection occurs, one or both things happen: the other side is too stupid to know what a good deal is, or we are not perceived as a good deal by the other side. Then we make the post-failure assessment: are we really a good deal? If we are, then no need to do anything. If we are not, then we need to work on ourselves to make ourselves become a good deal. See, things are simple if we take away the ego factor out of the equation. Sadly, only smart and strong humans can do so. Most humans are stupid and weak. They cannot think, cannot reason, cannot evaluate themselves objectively. They tend to over-inflate their worth. They cannot deal with emotional pains. Then they blame me! And then they hurl invectives and  insults, typically by saying that I am a failure, a cheat, a liar, a cheapskate, a lousy lay, etc...without realizing of the irony they are doing: if I am indeed all those, then they must be really stupid in going out with me in the first place or I am a supreme good actor. And since I know and everybody with eyes and ears and some functioning brain knows that I cannot act, then it becomes very clear that the fault lies with them, or rather, with their stupidity, but since we cannot divorce, separate stupidity from the persons who have them, so the fault lies with them. 

We are agents of free will. We know what we are doing. We respond to what we think are our needs and what the other person can offer. And if by chance and happenstance, we fall in love and the other person does care about us, then that's what magic is. Life is magical. We create our own magic. We make it happen by our personality, by the force of our intellect and the wonder of our heart. 

I repeat, wise humans never blame others when things go wrong. They blame themselves or the circumstances (chance factor). Blaming others is shifting responsibility, is playing the blame game. That's what children do. We are not children anymore. Yet, ironically, the most childish adults are the ones who constantly tell me that I am a child. As I wrote before, we hate in others what we see in ourselves. 

Go get some happiness. It's out there. If we know how to look. A hint: it's closer inside you, in your own heart than you think

Thus spoke Wissai. 

November 4, 2013