I've been thinking

I've Been Thinking

I've been thinking if I am being blessed or heading for a fall of some kind. Time will tell. I'm not greedy. Not really. Far from it. At any rate, I won't get conceited and elated or depressed and down on myself one way or another. I am not ignorant or stupid anymore. I have learned to face the muted and disinherited noises from my wounded heart; I have confronted the denied aspects of my soul, the places where I previously turned my back against. 

I know the ultimate purpose of my life which is to develop my mind, to write creatively, to live an honorable life, and to shoot for the attainable but so far elusive dream. 

At long last, I think I have arrived at some deep understanding of who I am. I need to cultivate the loving side of me and keep my heart as a blooming, nectar-rich flower where birds of paradise love to visit. I don't have to be a victim of my past. I can start living afresh and anew with every single day as the sun rises every morning from the eastern horizon. To be alive and in good health and with money should be a nice feeling if I have the purpose of my life clearly understood. 

Oh boy, I hear the music again tonight

From far, far away.

I don't quite understand what it wants to convey

But I'm not putting up a fight.

I wonder if thou art the one that sent the music my way

And set this heart of mine on fire.

All I can do is to take my iPad out and write

Until the fire subsides.