When you were young and lazy and unfocused, you read a lot of Chinese bullshit stories in translation about men who could perform extraordinary feats involving space and time travel that defied laws of physics known at the time. Now it appears that theoretically at least those feats are feasible. Time is now understood as no longer a linear progression but can be manipulated. Ditto for space. Space and time are now regarded as interrelated. Man is an incredible animal. Whatever it can imagine, it can do. Man is only limited by the limitations and the poverty of his imagination.
Armed with this flimsy knowledge of this vastly complicated subject, your mind is now playing with itself. You are strangely calm and are imagining you are living back to the past so you can influence the present and the future. With this game, all the hurts and losses are bearable. At the same time you are not agitated as you used to be and now can handle whatever life is throwing at you, including death, because you know you were already dead a long time ago.
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