I went for a walk this beautiful morning

I went for a walk this beautiful morning

I went for a walk this beautiful morning.
The sun was shining; birds were singing; 
And my heart was fluttering.
A soft susurrous sound surrounded me
It sweetly said, "Roberto, my dear honey,
Keep your faith, you're loved and you're blessed.
No matter what the stupid bitch said,
You're good, you're my kind of man
And I'm so glad we have met.
I don't know why that Jewish woman gave you pain.
You're tall, strong, gorgeous, and a poet.
What else did she want? 
Ah, maybe on her you didn't spend money.
Why should you? With her, keep being nonchalant.
I know, she's too stupid to see that she's "funny"
And almost everything she said was trite.
Forget her, don't let her get a rise out of you.
After all, you told me she wasn't too bright."
The sound was soft music to my ears 
It was exactly what I wanted to hear.
I rushed home and dug out a poem I wrote.
I now want to dedicate it to the sound I just met:

"voices to voices, lips to lips

                   with  heavy homage to e.e. cummings

voices to voices, lips to lips
i swear to you and to everyone else
that they make up the undying
of this sentiment that refuses to sleep

what's beyond logic 
can only be magic
in this moment that even God
cannot compete 

i bring you no flowers but only
scuplture of my words
if you close your eyes
you'll miss their kiss

voices and lips are more than just for songs and kisses
who cares if some sons of bitches
insist that Spring be the opening
of hearts and smiles

i am not afraid to dream that and this
nor am i afraid to fly"

Wissai
October 6, 2013

Reflections on the death of General Giap of Vietnam

Reflections on the death of General Giap of Vietnam

I hate banalities. I don't think I am afflicted with banalities. Profanities and sentimentalities, yes; but never banalities. The recent death of General Giap at an improbable age of 102 triggered a flood of commentaries, one of which was of such insufferable banality that I threw up my breakfast after I waded through the horrible, middle-school English level commentary redolent of boring bromides, and bereft of beautiful, beatific thoughts. 

The "writer" questioned why the western press didn't mention post-war rumors that asserted that Giap was not involved in the 1968 Tet Offensive and the Spring 1975 take-over of South Vietnam from the communist North. So what? Giap's life and achievements were great enough even if he was not involved with these military campaigns. 

The French say we can glean the character of a person through what and how he uses words. Le style, c'est l'homme. The above writer's words indicate that he is a pitiful human consumed with banalities and pettiness, and possessing no ability to learn from great examples right in front of his eyes. Maybe the writer constitutionally is so petty and feeble that he is incapable of seeing greatness and emulating from that. 

Regardless of what you think and feel about Communist ideology---and Giap was a communist---in fairness, in reflecting upon Giap's life, I cannot help having the following observations:

1. Giap was a patriot. With his education, he could have easily secured a safe and easy life in the colonial Vietnam. Instead, he risked his life to fight against the French invaders and colonizers. At the end of his life, he openly challenged the VC ruling elite, of which he was no longer a part, about their wisdom of allowing China, the ancient and implacable foe of Vietnam, to open bauxite mining operations in the militarily strategic Central Highlands of Vietnam.

2. He was largely a self-taught military strategist and an ardent student of history. All self-respecting intellectuals recognize the importance of really knowing history. Only fools and half-assed, half-educated, deluded college graduates fail to pay attention to history. Without a firm grasp of history, we don't know where we came from, where we are, and where we are likely to go. Without a good understanding of philosophy, we don't know how to think and how not to be enslaved by religious and political charlatans and hustlers. 

3. Giap managed to live until a very ripe age of 102. He must have done something right. At any rate, he made a name for himself and history will remember him. No matter how we judge him as a human being, one thing we could not deny is that he answered the call of his conscience and the love for his country, and he elected to fight against the hated French colonizers who raped and bled Vietnam in order to enrich themselves and France. Right now, Vietnam is facing the existential threat from the ancient and implacable foe China, how many of us Vietnamese are willing to risk our lives to fight against the rapacious and evil Chinese, as Giap did against the French? 

Wissai
October 5, 2013

Obamacare and Justice and "Other" Things

Obamacare and Justice and "Other" Things.

The line of arguments presented by Anti-Obamacare proponents smacks of sophistry and selfishness to the core. In a country as allegedly "advanced" and "developed" and "democratic" as the United States, health care should be a right for all of its citizens, even if that requires the better-off to lighten their pockets to help out the less fortunate. The arguments put up by the Anti-Obamacare proponents sound eerily similar to those used by slavery ("state's rights [sic!!!]) advocates in 19th century and anti-civil rights proponents in the 1960's, and these arguments fly straight into the face of basic decency, fairness, and love for fellow men.

A society where inequity exists in an extreme (right now there does exist an increasing unequal access to healthcare in America. Obamacare tries to rectify that) cannot last long. All revolutions start from pent-up frustrations and when enough people say, "enough is enough" and we certainly don't want a bloody revolution in America, do we? Nature does not favor excess. Eventually (that may take a long time), forces will arise and restore balance. Excess gives rise to unbalance leading to breakdown and restoration. Too much of anything is bad. Egocentrism (selfishness per common parlance) is useful for self-assertion and survival, but too much of it, i.e., without being tempered by empathy, will lead to conflict and destruction. A society peopled by all egocentric souls cannot last. At a higher level of consciousness, there is no me nor you. There is only one interdependent us. It's a forgone conclusion that the VC regime as it currently exists cannot last because it is a regime founded on and fostered by injustice and excess. Hegelian dialectic has a point. Society evolves by the circle of thesis, antithesis, synthesis, and back to thesis, antithesis, and so on. There's force and counter-force, not only in physics, but in human affairs and arguments as well. Ignorance mocks at things it does not or cannot understand instead of being willing to learn. 

Admittedly, there is waste in government in America, but that should not be an excuse to be used against Obamacare (which does not involve the government, instead of private insurance companies, to administer and manage healthcare, does it?) which will go down in history as significant as anti-slavery, social security, and civil rights legislation. 

Roberto Wissai/NKBa', BSR

A day at the doctor's office

A day at the doctor's office

Who says Fall's weather is nice? Cool, fresh, invigorating air, colorful foliage in the trees, migrating birds in the air, and all that shit? Not where I am residing. The weather is still fucking suffocatingly, oppressively hot and humid. That coupled with recent unpleasant encounters with scumbags and assholes make me want to kill one or maybe two of them, but since I dreaded losing my freedom, if not my own life, I called up a shrink with whom Omar used to "consult" and asked him to see me as quickly as he could. I used Omar as a reference. I wondered what kind of fucking business the stupid shrink had because he, instead of a secretary, answered the phone and apparently did all the secretarial duties. He remembered Omar well, but obviously not fondly. I detected a hint of wariness on his part as he put me through the screening process. So I exploited that. I told and sold him a bunch of bullshit stories of how Omar and I were bosom buddies during and after the second Iraq War. He wondered how come I didn't avail myself of the mental health services that the VA offered free of charge to the veterans. I answered that I hated bureaucracy and invariably had flashbacks and headaches when walking into federal buildings that are frequented by men in uniform and former men in uniform but who now walk around with a cane in hand and obviously out of shape and in much pain. Their faces said everything about them and about me, and I didn't want people cognizant of who I was, except Omar and now maybe this Dr. Fuckenstein himself. The bastard shamelessly brought up the question of payment. He wanted cash only. One seventy five U.S. dollars, not pesos, for 55 minutes. I told him that wouldn't be a problem. 

I arrived on a Friday, five days after the phone call, at 5pm. The office was nicer than I anticipated. It was small, but elegantly furnished. And I was right. There was no secretary.  There was nobody waiting in the reception area which consisted of a table upon which were placed various magazines (Psychology Today, National Geographic, Time) and two armchairs. There was a wooden door with a peephole and a sign that read, "Arthur Fuckenstein, M.D., Ph.D." There was a sign on the wall above a bell, "Please ring for appointment." I rang the bell because I did have an appointment. I heard some noise and then the peephole darkened. Fuckenstein was checking me out. Apparently satisfied with my appearance, he went back to his desk and pressed the button. I heard a beep and a booming voice, "Please come in."

The doctor himself sat behind the desk. He rose up and shook my hand. He didn't deign to come around the desk to greet me. I decided to hate the asshole. I hated all power-hungry assholes. 

-I hope you don't mind, but we first need to take care of the payment up front.
-I understand. Here you are ( I gave him 4 bills: $100, $50, $20, and $5. He coolly took out a counterfeit-detection pen and drew a line all through of them. I was annoyed so I said, "excuse me, doc. What would happen if I brought with me the money in singles. You are not going to sit there and check them all, are you?" He just winked at me, and said nothing, yet, until he put the money in a upper right drawer of the desk).
-Of course not, nobody went through the trouble of making counterfeits off one-dollar bills. Not cost effective. Besides, downright stupid. But if a client pays me in one-dollar bills, that would tell me a lot about the client. In my profession, I can't afford not to be vary careful. I deal with sick, unbalanced humans who think and feel differently from ordinary people. Anyway, you told me over the phone you were depressed and suicidal and yet homicidal at the same time. Do you still feel so?
-I don't know right now.
-You don't know how you feel?
-That's correct. I've mixed emotions and feelings all the time. And that's killing me, quite literally. I feel I'm exploding and I've to do something to keep myself from exploding. 
-When did you first experience these conflicting emotions and feelings?
-All my life, since puberty. But they seem to get out of control the last few weeks. 
-Are you able to sleep without the aid of pills or booze?
-Mercifully, yes, but I don't sleep long hours. Four or five hours the most. 
-But they are sound, deep sleep, yes?
-Yes.
-Full of dreams, but you could hardly recall any of theme when you wake up.
-Yes. 
-Good. I can work with you. Rather, you can work with me. You see, it will be you who will do all the work. I just point out to you what you need to think and feel and then act.
-What kind of psychotherapy school do you belong to?
-Mr. Wissai, I belong to no school. There are over 450 different approaches or schools of thought in psychotherapy, each claims to be the most effective in treating mental disorders. I don't buy that bullshit. I have a degree in psychiatry. I am a medical doctor. I also have a doctorate in clinical psychology. They overlap somewhat, but they are of use to each other, at least to me. I take into full account not only of the body, especially of the brain, but the sum of life experiences a patient has had and how he addresses and integrates those experiences. Besides, I am a Buddhist, a converted one, of course, but aren't we all, eventually anyway. And that helps me a lot in not setting me apart and superior to my clients. I learn as much as, if not more, from my clients as they do from me. There's no me nor you. There's only one us, trying to go through this life with at least pain as possible. But if pressed to describe my orientation to psychotherapy, I would say I favor cognitive behavioral, humanistic, existential approaches to mental disorders. Most mental disorders are organic in nature. That is to say, some areas in the brain are damaged or dysfunctional and need to be corrected. Medication and sometimes surgery are what needed. Other mental disorders stem from maladaptations to the stresses of life and/or from lack of understanding what life, in fact living, is all about. That's when the patient needs help from the therapist in seeing his thinking about life's issues such as survival, sex, marriage, money, power, fame, honor and respect, self-respect, and so on, needs to be on a firm track. 
-So what do you think of my case? Why do I have conflicting emotions and feelings?
-Because you're so damn smart and sensitive and egocentric. We just need to work on the egocentric part and you'll be fine. Mr. Wissai, after I talked to you five days ago, I went to work on you right away. I called Omar Sabat and we talked about you at length. You are lucky to have a friend like Omar. He really likes you. He is really your friend. He cares about you. In fact he was begging me to treat you. He told me everything about you, including your work as a cultural anthropologist (huh?, so Omar lied on my behalf!) with his unit and how you two became friends. Essentially, he told me you are incredibly well read so what I am going to say is not going to be over your head. Mr. Wissai, you must learn to do three things right away. First, regular and daily, preferably, physical exercises and meditation. Second, laugh out loud and hard for 30 minutes each day in the morning after you wake up. Third, stop being petty-minded. You must learn to forgive those who have offended you and your ego. Those people are small, stupid, and ignorant scumbags and assholes, your favorite characterizations of them. Holding a grudge against them makes you the same as them. And you are better than them, much better. Don't drag yourself to their level. Your session is over. I really don't think you need to come back. By the way, here's your money back. This session is free, a small payback to your friend Omar who kindly got rid of a mean, nasty competitor of mine who was bent on destroying me. Say hello to Omar for me. Let's me walk you to the door. Good luck to you. And nice meeting you. 

Wissai
October 3, 2014

It's maybe a thing of course

Cũng lẽ tự nhiên thôi

Sẽ có một ngày
Rồi cũng có một ngày
Em không còn yêu...
không còn yêu anh nữa
Xin đừng buồn
Cũng lẽ tự nhiên thôi
Chuyện thế gian
Biến chuyển lẽ thường tình
nên trái tim em
cũng không ngoài lệ ấy
***
Hoặc ngược lại
nếu anh hết yêu em
Sẽ mĩm cười
Em vui lòng chấp nhận
Chớp mắt một cái
Nước mắt rơi trên má
Khóc một lần!
Khóc cho đã, rồi thôi!
***
Lý tưởng nhất
Mình... chán nhau cùng lúc
Chia tay nhau
Có nghĩa chúc mừng nhau
Không khổ đau
Cũng không hề oán trách
Gặp lại nhau
vẫn tay bắt mặt mừng
***
Dấu yêu ơi!
Mình chẳng phải lo xa
Mối tình mình, chỉ là tình trên ảo
Thì tội gì...
Thì làm gì mà có chuyện thương đau?!

Quách Như Nguyệt
October 3rd, 2013

It's maybe a thing of course

there'll be a day
yes, there'll be a day
i no longer love...
i no longer love you no more 
don't be sad, baby
it's a thing of course, maybe
in this world
nothing lasts forever 
my heart will get bored 
my affection for you will be severed
...
on the other hand
if you love me no more
i'll put on a smile
but a tear will fall
when i first blink
i'll cry once!
i'll cry a lot and then no more!
...
best of all, 
we'll be ...bored at each other at the same time
saying goodbye 
means wishing a luck sublime 
we won't be in pain
neither will we play a blame game 
and if we ever meet again
we'll shake hands and smile
and say, how do you do?
...
oh dear honey!
we shouldn't worry in advance
our love is only a love on the Net 
so why should it be...
how could it be a story that ends in pain?!

loosely translated by wissai
october 3, 2013

Life's Simple Pleasures and Your Life as a "Thinker" and "Writer"

Life's Simple Pleasures and Your Life as a "Thinker" and "Writer"

Life is "good" and supposed to be "fun", too. That is what people have told you all these years, but you never believed them until now. You were too stupid, too wrapped up with your own little miseries to know any better. Until very recently. Humor helped you see the light. It opened your eyes. You were blessed with a sense of humor. It was dumb of you not to use it. You see, if you learn to laugh at certain people, you would not be that mad at them. 

People are often very funny, unwittingly funny. They take themselves too seriously while they are full of shit. They think they are better than they actually are. They think the world pays them attention and takes note of whatever they do, but the reality is that the world is supremely indifferent about them.  Everybody is busy to survive and to be free from pain. You used to be trusting and gullible, but are not anymore, hence no longer disappointed. To really love somebody means you must trust and respect the person, otherwise it is just empty words and wet dreams and complex signs and gestures of literature. 

Life has a lot to offer in terms of pleasures: food, sex, friendship, humor, nature, dogs as pets, music, reading, writing, singing, and physical exercises. Please note you don't mention fame or "power". You think only stupid assholes would be after power. They may not know by hankering and lusting after power, they make enemies and may actually die in the pursuit of what they set their myopic sights on. In addition, most of "powerful" people are not really happy. They know some people hate them, actually want to kill them, so they worry most of the time, even after they lose power. 

As a self-declared "thinker" and "philosopher", you always grapple with these basic existential questions: Why are you here? Where will you go after you die? What makes you happy and why? What do you want to do with your life? By confronting these questions and coming up with the answers you can't help but think poorly of those noise-makers who have no real talents, despite their having advanced degrees and have a certain status in society simply because they have not achieved anything that is momentous and earth-shaking. Somebody is really somebody when he revolutionizes the thinking of mankind about certain subject or comes up with a piece of artistic creation that is lasting in impact. An engineer is nobody unless he is an Eiffel; a physicist will be an unknown unless he is a Newton, Einstein, or a Hawking; an architect means shit unless he is a Corbusier; a painter is crap unless he is a Van Gogh; a doctor is just an ordinary prescription drug writer unless he is a Pasteur; a lawyer is just a glorified legal clerk unless he is a Warren or a Marshall; a philosopher is just a crabby dreamer unless he is a Kant, a Nietzsche, a Hegel, a Marx, or a Heidegger; and a writer is miserable unless he is a Nobel Prize winner. Most bestseller writers in pop fiction who make tons of money but receive no attention from literary critics and establishment know they just prostitute themselves because they dare not or cannot go for high fiction. Nobody will ever read them in college literature classrooms. Your point is that the world is full of ordinary, untalented clerks and professionals but these assholes think they are really somebodies just because they can read and put words together. They are clogging the Internet with their stupid nonsense. 

Back to the existential questions, here are your answers:

1. You are here because of a gratuitous event and chance encounter of an egg and a sperm. Luckily for you, the egg and the sperm were of good source, and their possessors were decent folks and took care of you. You were an accident and a choice. 

2. After you die, your body will swell up with gas as a result of decomposition and you will be eaten by bugs, animals (if not properly buried),and bacteria. The elements that made up of you will be absorbed into these organisms or into the ground. You will not go to heaven or descend to hell or reincarnate as some stupid religions say so. And you don't believe in God, and definitely think those who do so are very stupid or brainwashed. 

3. What makes you happy is when you are able to sleep well, write cogently on a subject, compose a good poem or short story, able to laugh at the follies and stupidities and ignorance of yourself and others, look at yourself in the mirror and think you are still good-looking and sexy, read a good book, and are loved by a caring, unselfish, pretty woman.

4. As long as you live, you want to improve your mind, acquire knowledge, and try to write memorable poems and short stories. 

You have high standards. Most humans you encounter in real life and on the Internet are assholes and don't impress you at all, not a bit. So why do you have to show them respect? Why, Why, Why??? Oh, you get it!  Because society, common sense and decorum, "civilization" and "culture",  wisdom, cleverness, and "you get what you dish out" say so. 

But you are stopping short. You have not really declared who you are, what you have accomplished, and who are the influences on your "thinking".

You repeat, none of the people you have met either in real life or on the Internet really impress you. Some are decent, caring, even knowledgeable individuals, and worthy of your respect. But that's about it. They don't make your eyes glaze over and you want to rush over and bow to them and ask them to accept you as a pupil. 

You always ask yourself what is your contribution to mankind in terms of ideas and art. The answer is none in ideas and insignificant in art. 

You cannot really think of an idea that you have is really original and revolutionary. All you have is what you learned from others. So, what are they? Okay, let's hear them.

1. You are an accident, a gratuitous event in a world that has no meaning by itself. You were born, grow up, and die, and will not live again. Those who think differently are stupid simpletons and slaves of religious charlatans. What do you want to do with your life is up to you. Most humans are stupid so they chose to go after money, security, fame and power. You go after knowledge and the arts. You maintain that life is a process to become who you are.

2. You hold that most humans are scumbags and deserve to be exterminated. They have no decency, no sense of honor, no loyalty, no compassion and feelings for other forms of life besides themselves. They are animals so they do whatever necessary to survive. They are born shameless liars and hypocrites. They are the opposites of whatever they present themselves. Societal rules and laws were designed to control and keep these animals in check because to kill them outright is an impractical and impossible matter.

3. Human life is always a tension between self-preservation and self-destruction.

4. Love between two humans does exist, but it is rare. If you love somebody, but that person does not love you back, don't blame that person. You may not be good enough for him or her. Nobody,  in his right mind, throws away a good thing. Most unhappiness in love pursuit occurs when we aim too high. Yet if we aim too low, we get bored and dissatisfied. Most divorces take place because the people involved didn't wait long enough for the right partner. They were scared and impatient, so they settled for second, third, or fourth best. They really had no confidence in themselves. 

5. Social life operates on the principles of power. The sooner you understand that, the less unhappy and angry you become.

6. No matter what, and how tempting the urge is, you must fight against injustice and unfairness. You only hurt those who have hurt you. Spare innocent bystanders. Hitler was wrong in ordering Paris be burned to the ground. And the Shabaah terrorists were wrong in shooting at women and children in the mall in Kenya. 

7. Buddha was a wise psychologist, Muhammad was the most rounded individual compared to Buddha and Jesus, though still ignorant of causes of things. Jesus was delusional and power-hungry. His early death was no surprise. Dying then and dying now for your political and religious beliefs is not a smart thing to do because there's always a possibility that you are wrong. Most humans who become politicized are angry people. Anger is an energizer, but often is a lousy teacher. 

8. It is a stupid thing for the Vietnamese to keep fighting among themselves Their enemy is the Chinese, not the other Vietnamese. Not finding a common ground with your fellow countrymen in the midst of a foreign invasion does nothing good to your cause, but everything good for the invaders. 

9. Thinkers who have exerted an intellectual influence on you are many, but Nietzsche and Sartre are the most pronounced. From N you learned to become who you are and to live life dangerously. From S you find the ideas of authenticity and existence preceding essence attractive. 

10. In spite of your whining and crying, you have been blessed. You believe in second chances, in starting over and over again until you die, in persistence, and in redemption. 

As for the arts, you have written some good poems and amateurish short stories. 

Wissai
September 23, 2013

Mysteries of Life

Mysteries of Life

-You see, Roberto, there's what I think gradualism and relativity and maybe circularity in this world and on this planet. We see that in climate, the formation of gender, biochemistry, nature of goodness and evil, love and hate, death and regeneration. The world is more than just dualism. It may be one whole interdependent biosphere.  Once you understand that, your own harrowing and unnerving experiences that shape your thinking and then go on governing your mode of feeling begin to lose their power. There's no longer you and I. There's only one us. That's why a truly ego-shattering sexual experience is very meaningful because you then realize you are not alone, isolated, disconnected. You feel whole and at peace and maybe indeed loved. 

Each human develops at his own pace. One guy may be intellectually precocious but emotionally and socially retarded. Another is dumb as shit but gregarious and well liked. Still another is a late bloomer in all areas. That is what's happening to me. I was not born stupid or anything, but I didn't care for learning when I was growing up. I was busy being myself and rebelling against authorities. Nowadays, I think I finally know who I am and I still rebel against authorities. Self-discovery, at least to me. is an on-going process. However, I notice that I am thirsty for knowledge and finding ways to satisfy that thirst. In the process, I've noted several interesting things:

First, I am intellectually more honest than most, if not all, humans I've met. 

Second, most humans have fragile and insecure egos; unlike me, they would not or cannot admit defeats, mistakes, and weaknesses. They feel they have to be right and strong so they thrash around arguing until they are blue in the face even when their arguments are infantile and weak and nonsensical and bereft of facts and logic. You see, one of them stupidly stated that the Second Indochina War started in 1954! I wonder how the bastard could made such a simple mistake despite the fact that he was born in Vietnam and lived there until 1966. This self-regarded "educated" dude did not know when the civil war in his own country started! That showed you how stupid and ignorant he was. Another asshole blindly accepted some stupid myth that an empire lasted on the average for 200 years so he posted that myth on the Net. An abysmally ignorant dude, proudly wearing his doctorate designation on his forehead, chimed in and publicly opined that American Empire was in death throes because the 200-year period is almost up. I felt that I had to jump in and teach these two pathetic ignoramuses a lesson about history. I listed many famous empires lasting way for more than 200 years, and pointed out to them that the American Empire didn't officially start to come into existence until 1898, the year the U.S. resoundingly defeated Spain in a brief war and effectively put an end to the Spanish Empire which, by the way, lasted more than 200 years. 

At any rate, most bastards, in trying to save face, put on a farcical performance. It is both an amusing and sad sight. Yet they pathetically regard themselves "educated". They are nothing but a bunch of disingenuous, dishonest, pathetic, ignorant, stupid, fucked-up monkeys. I despise them all. If I have the means, I would gas all of them in a second. To me, they are not even humans, but only vermin, unfit to live. Where's Hitler when I need him? I've heard that there's a guy that looks uncannily like Adolph, lurking somewhere in the Black Forest, building an underground network of Neo-Nazism. Maybe I "need" to go to Germany to check the dude out. 

Third, most people are hypocrites. The worst ones are those who always paint themselves in the best light. I constantly put them to a test. Those who constantly fail are the ones loving to talk about ethics and honor and respect. You see, humans tend to pretend who they are not. They are not comfortable with who they are. The ones who are truly ethical, honorable, and treat others with respect are usually the silent ones. They let their actions speak for them. They don't need to preach to others or to advertise themselves as to what fine specimens of the human race they are. Recently one asshole publicly got on a soapbox and preached that I needed to show respect for another ignorant asshole while the fact of the matter is that the preaching asshole is notorious for being an arrogant, smug, supercilious bastard.               

Fourth, almost of us humans are walking wounded and broken in some form or another. We let the past and its haunting memories, both good and bad, influence on how we think and feel, instead of dealing with the facts at hand. We all suffer from confirmation biases. Obsessional thoughts are unresolved and unacceptable thoughts. We must learn to accept mistakes, defeats, and sorrows. And we move on. That's the secret of survival and healing. We are never as good and error-free as we would like to be. We must accept who we are and whatever has happened to us. Serenely accepting whatever life has to offer is the key for survival. I don't advocate passivity in the face of adversities. What I mean is that we must know the difference between what can be changed and what cannot. That's the difference between those, like me, who survived the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan at the fighting front, mentally intact and emotionally stronger, and those former comrades of mine who are suicidal and being tarted for post-stress disorder syndrome. Those poor souls have not learned the power of acceptance. The painful memories play like an unbroken record in their minds until they take over their minds. The memories control the mind, instead of the other way around. These former comrades don't realize that we cannot change the past and we don't live in the past. We live in the here and now, in the present and only for the present. Life is nothing but the sum of experiences and a series of adjustments and adaptations. That's what all living things do. Adjust, adapt, move on and survive. Look forward, not backward, and certainly not in anger, but in serenity and detachment. Words have power. Keep words like peace, serenity, detachment, calmness, cool, wise, smart in your mind at all times while smiling at all hours, even when you are alone, you will be amazed how calm and strong you will become. About Laura and the bitches that gave you pain, stop writing sappy, soapy love poems about them. Write about your triumphs, not defeats.

I hope you are not thinking I am preaching. I'm only trying to help because you're my friend, Roberto.

-Thanks, Omar. You're very kind. I need to click off. I have something to do now.
-What's that, may I ask?
-I don't know I should tell you now because if I do, you may consider putting me in a gas chamber along with other dudes you mentioned earlier.