Father's Day

He called his son on Father's Day, not the other way around, to tell him, his surviving and only offspring that he loved him very much. The brief conversation left such a void in him that the subsequent 5 phone calls from various admirers and aficionadas could not fill. Love is a strange emotion, especially if there are blood ties involved.

Depressed and dejected on Father's Day, he dragged himself to the gym where he worked himself to exhaustion. On the way back to his apartment, he realized that his recent forays into romanticism were more for sociological investigations than the flutterings of the heart because his age and his philosophical mindset would always steer him to a tragi-comic outlook and conclusion on such last minute, desperate grasp of the straws of sentimentality before meeting the Maker.

-"Your fears and mistrusts and cynical views contribute to your loneliness, don't you know that? Don't you know that to live long, one has to have a youthful, vibrant outlook on life. Of course, one should not be too trusting or stupid and naive as one was in his youth. But one should not be a grumpy old man, spouting boring, cynical views all day long."

-Yes sir! I heard you loud and clear. Is there anything else you'd like to add? Summer is late and so am I. I normally would feel hot blood coursing through my veins by this time of the year. Instead, I hear the sirens of caution and the warnings of possible hurts and disappointments. The song "You Screwed Up My Life" was played with a note of urgency. The saxophone left a lingering, single wailing sound at the end, making me feel that the brassy sun was lost and forelorn behind thick billowing clouds.

-Roberto, I have a hard time understanding you. You walked away from a millionaire-heiress and widow. You turned down overtures of sexy admirers and aficionadas. But you're falling hard for a destitute, over-the-hill, twice-divorced, poorly-educated, occassionally untruthful woman with shriveled tits, fairly large tummy, and shrunken ass. I don't understand what she has that captivated you.

-Silvio, I know she lies occasionally, that she skirts around the truth from time to time. But she isn't that much different from many of us in that regard. On the other hand, she has basic honesty and kindness and self-respect. She isn't lazy. And she is concerned about image. She is more worried about what the common folks think of me, of my disdain for conventional wisdom than of her own image. She's poor, but she not once asked me for money. I like her smile, her courage, her singing. I know she won't be a tigress in bed, but somehow I have this feeling that if I hold her tight in my arms, she would quiver and quaver and tremble with fear and excitement and she would tell me that I need to focus on my well-being, on recapturing my wealth without damaging my health. She would say that she felt flattered and confused that I chose her over many other competing women. She would keep saying over and over again that, please don't make her suffer and bring her shame in the few years she still has on this planet. Last but not least, she wants me to be happy. My heart trampolines whenever she smiles at me.

-You're crazy. You read too many soapy, stupid novels. I have news for you. This world operates differently than you think. Forget her. She's bad news. Focus on making money. Go out with attractive, nice women. Stay away from talkative, querulous, garrulous old women. Stop looking for a mother figure. I know you miss your mother and you still love and pine for her. Be normal, Roberto, live like the rest of us. Be around attractive, young women. Don't fool around with over-the-hill old women. They are dangerous. They think too much. Don't trust them.

-Okay, here's the deal. I won't call her, not tonight nor any other night. I will be AWOL. If she really loves me, she would know where to look for me. She will break down and cry for hours. On the other hand, if silence is her route, then she will tread on that route alone, without me by her side. I won't be suffering. And essentially nothing is lost except a few dollars and time. I will be wiser. And I won't speculate if she has learned anything. I, on the other hand, have learned a lot, especially about myself. She was right the last time we talked. She said, focus on making money and take good care of your health.

-Now, you're talking! Be strong. Be practical. Don't be stupid.

(cont.)