The Dark Side of Laughter

The Dark Side of Laughter

Maybe you already guessed it. I tried to put on a nonchalant, insouciant front upon receiving the news of Robin Willians' demise at his own hands, but the fact remains I have been very much affected by his death. I admired him. I read a lot of myself into him, just as I have been doing with Nietzsche. To live is to find ways not to die. I read Nietzsche the same way as I read Camus, Sartre, and several others: to find strength; to learn; to seek self-acceptance. Camus began "The Myth of Sisyphus" with a declaration that there is only one philosophical question, and that's suicide. To Camus, whether there is a God or not is not important. That's an idle speculation. Death by suicide is not an idle speculation. It is a way to say No to Life. 

As humans, we must learn to say No to scumbags and assholes end hypocrites and dumb asses, but we must always say Yes to Life. We must learn to like and love ourselves, thinking and really believing that we are worthwhile and lovable. I just sang out loud various songs in three languages. I sang out loud, with abandonment and unrestraint, with joy and freedom. I liked my own voice. The lyrics and the melodies were good. Outside the thermometer on the porch showed the temperature not in the 100s as it would usually be. Trees are swaying with the wind. Last night much needed rain arrived in town. I felt alive and blessed and good. Life is worth living. To be able to have that attitude about life, one must be a bit arrogant, cocksure, combative, truculent, optimistic, and resilient. I wonder how many of us would put our lives on the line, to skate to near the mouth of the abyss, and took a look into the abyss and feel its reckoning, but are strong enough not to jump? How many of us would act like a financial warrior by putting large sums of money at risk and feel the surge of the excitement caused the adrenaline? To know the meaning of life, one must taste death by going to war, over oneself, with neighbors and the world. To play safe with life is to experience boredom, cowardice, and a slow death. We all die anyway. At my age, ten or twenty more years on this planet make very little difference to me. What counts is everyday could be my last day on earth. Having that kind of attitude makes my getting up in the morning when dawn breaks a thrilling experience, food taste better, humor ready and laughter irresistible, love an unforgettable experience, and sex a true adventure. 

It's hard for me to fake humility and modesty when I have to interact with animals who are much dumber and less informed about the world than I am. I just cannot stand idiots who believe in a Personal God, watch Fox News religiously, are poorly read and are plainly incurious about the affairs of the world, and yet they gamely put on a show of being knowledgeable and logical. Many humans are no better than barnyard animals. And their leaders regard them as such. To be weak is to invite attack. To be stupid and uneducated is to be easily enslaved. I am positively, absolutely sure that none of them could ever express themselves in writing as I did in this mini-essay and elsewhere. Their stupidity is shown in their incoherence and jejune, juvenile way of "thinking" and "reasoning". They totally lack self-awareness and self-honesty.