Primal Scream

Unlike Arthur Janov's assertion, the scream is not necessarily therapeutic. It's far better to stay calm at all times.

If you feel a wrong has been done to you, ask yourself if it's justified. If it is, then accept it and move on. If it is not, find out if it's intentional. If it is, ask yourself if you can live with it. If not, then find ways to punish the bastard, even if it takes 1,000 years.

And if you think a wrong has been done by you to other(s) in ignorance or arrogance, apology and amends should be promptly issued.

There's no need to scream your head off. It does you no good. In fact, it weakens you and degrades you. All it serves is to show others that you are weak and lack self-control. It is not even therapeutic as you think. This world is full of screaming creatures already. Your voice is weak. You can't outscream the monkeys and the animals in both arboreal and urban jungles.

So breathe in and breathe out and say softly to the monkey, "you have a 'point' there" and then you walk away. You didn't say he had a good or wrong point so you didn't lie, didn't compromise your integrity.

How come you know so much about the dynamics of screaming? You used to scream a lot yourself. Many of your words have an empirical flavor and touch and sound. You hate lying and empty pontificating. You do try to rise above cacophony. You are aware that in a demonstration crowd, beneath and hidden in the primal scream and rage are the euphoria and the release, but not necessarily the wisdom and the truth.

The same for the ardent expression of love may indicate more a self-oriented love for the declarer than an affection for the beloved. True, passionate love is often quiet and patient, not noisy and urgent. Deep love is acceptance and forgiveness, not keeping score and demanding reciprocity. True love knows about peace and serenity, not tumult and anxiety. If by loving somebody, you experience peace and strength, not disturbance over your helplessness under the charm of your beloved, then maybe you really understand what love means. Love does not need any primal cry of affection. It is manifested by the quiet display of tenderness and support.

Many, many years ago, you once told a woman that your affection for her made you feel strong. She strangely responded by running away from you. You watched her run away, with serenity and pity and bemusement in your heart. You didn't feel the registration of anger in your consciousness. Your love for her was not meant to be. It was not what it was not. Such was life. Life went on and it did. Screaming would not change the situation. Running after her would just degrade you. It could be that it was she, not you, who was missing a golden opportunity to grow and be happy with the beloved. Love and Ego are mutually exclusive. Ego dissolves in Love, not the other way around.

Ego is a dangerous double-edged sword. Some humans wisely use it to improve their minds; most, however, blindly and reflexively cover their sense of insecurity and inadequacy by lies, denials, and distortions in the name of trying to even the hurt. True pride is different from Ego.