SprinterOrMarathoner

Sprinter or Marathoner, A "Short Story"

I chuckled all the way to the running trail this early morning when the late summer sun didn't yet start making its ascent on the east side of town behind the mountain range. Once the run started, the chuckling stopped and the reverie began. My body went into a default mode of putting one foot in front of the other at a pace not much faster than that of a power walking while my mind went into a free association. 

A stupid fool exhorted his fellow fools not to argue with me about whether or not God exists. You cannot argue with me anyway, asshole. You are a stupid, superstitious, ignorant, brainwashed little dog that really doesn't have a functioning brain. 

The little twit even reminded his fellow twits that I am a "communist". Wrong. Your grandpa is a socialist, maybe even a Marxist, but never a communist. Communism is a bankrupt, outdated, unworkable ideology. Everybody knows that. And nobody follows it now. Grow up, get on with the times. Follow the news. Use your head, whatever you have in it. I hope yours is not completely empty and functions only as an echo chamber for your religious and political brainwashers. 

Remember, one can tell who and what you are from the way you write. So, be careful, my little twit. Do you know that it is you who are suffering right now? You suffer from self-righteous anger, ignorance, and stupidity. Like so many of your fellow twits and nitwits and dumb asses, you are suffering without knowing that you are suffering. That's how incredibly stupid you are. 

As I have written time and time again, I don't hate you guys. Not really. I just pity you. Having been born as human beings, you guys are so dumb that you cannot behave like true humans. Instead, you lie, smugly believe in superstitions, and hate genuine, authentic, enlightened human beings who don't share your stupid, superstitious beliefs, the kind of beliefs to which only fools and slaves subscribe. 

Worst of all, in your everyday behavior you cannot even follow the teachings of the founder of your religion. You have no Love in you at all, based on the venomous Hate I see dripping from your pen. Learn to love, and you will feel better; you will understand what the man said right before his death,  "Father, please forgive them for they do not know what they're doing". 

I don't practice the same faith as you do, but every freaking day when I meditate and listen to the chant Om Mani Padme Hum, my being is full of Forgiveness and Peace. I forgive you and your ilk because you guys are just like barnyard animals. You guys don't know any better. You guys are dwelling in Darkness and Ignorance.

Guess what? I don't call myself a Christian, but I am a far better Christian than all of you put together. You guys are just Christians in name. You live a hollow life. 

I recognize Jesus's good points, especially his message about Love and Forgiveness. I just don't believe in his divinity. I am an atheist, remember?  Maybe I am biased and prejudiced but I look at all theists with askance, with a jaundiced eye, and think that there must be something wrong with the brains of all these people. Something must be missing in there; something having to do with a rigorous way of thinking that demands hard proofs, strong evidence, and logic before believing in something or some being. Instead of saying Jesus was a Son of God, or God in the flesh, it would be far better to say here was a good, decent man who cared about poor people, who was full of Love, despite his occasional temper tantrums, and should be an example for others to follow his way of  behavior, you guys just elevated him to be a God and made a mockery of human rationality, human ability to reason, to think. 

Frankly, all my previous "short stories" had a powerful, intriguing beginning, then problems started piling up. This story, with a weird but catchy title, "Sprinter or Marathoner", may suffer the same fate. We will soon find out in the next few weeks. 

I looked at him: olive-complexioned; intelligent, dark set eyes; thin lips; beard and a goatee quite common in where he came from; chiseled facial features; cold, impassive expressions. He spoke excellent American English, with a slight trace of Oxbridge accent. He tried to pass himself off as an American. He should not sport the beard, however. The beard and the Oxbridge accent betrayed him. But I kept my mouth shut. I played the fool. I shook his hand firmly and said, "Glad to meet you. I've heard so much about you." 

"The honor is all mine", he said, looking straight at my eyes. "Thanks for inviting me into your home. Based on what you told me over the phone, and meeting you here in person, I don't know, I don't think you need my help. You did the right thing to practice Silence. You spoke enough, maybe more than enough. You have fulfilled your duties as a patriot. 

The world is going crazy in one way or another from Day 1. Man is a strange, self-conflicting, self-destructive animal. Look at yourself. Look at me. Look at everyone around you. Very few are well-integrating, balanced, happy, caring, loving people.

If you want to test people, ask them to give up money, time, or effort to help you. Challenge their ego. Make them angry. See how they respond to your testing them. That's when their true colors come out. 

I am one of a very few good folks around. That's a truth not well known. My guiding lights of conduct /behavior are Truth, Justice, and Love. 

You have a fragile ego and tend to lash out in anger. You want to hurt and to retaliate. You employ sarcasm as a weapon. That's your defense by default. That is not to say you are a bad person, but only a weak-minded individual who can't take criticism even if it is valid. Your first instinct is to throw back the criticism to the face of the critic. You act as if you were an echo chamber. That's childish and stupid. You fail to grasp a cardinal truth that any valid criticism is a godsend, an opportunity for you to get ahead. In the final analysis, Love is the best guiding light. Actually it is the only guiding light you need. Truth and Justice are just different dimensions of Love, if you really think about the issue. If you are full of Love, people will flock to you like bees to honey, not to necessarily exploit you, but to bask in your presence of Peace and Trust. Understand what I'm trying to say? No? Well, let me tell you a sad, but illuminating story. Perhaps it will help. 

A female physician with whom I was infatuated when I was a lad of 18, visited the U.S. with her fellow physician husband from somewhere on this planet Earth. There was a getting together for dinner for former high school exchange students in Huntington Beach, CA. The coordinator of the event who knew of my infatuation asked me if I would like to be there. I declined on account of my inability to break a prior engagement. I haven't seen her since 1967. And it's very unlikely that I will ever see her again. Something is better left unsaid and some woman is better unseen in order for the adolescent magic to be preserved. 

She was a source of several beautiful (though full of bathos) poems in English. She was the first woman that moved my heart, and maybe the whole being as well. She inspired me to work on my French. She went to a French high school where the medium of instruction was French. I went to an indigenous school, and had only two years of French as a secondary foreign language. I could now speak, read, and write French in a somewhat acceptable fashion thanks to her going through, briefly and fleetingly, my life. She served as a model for all the subsequent women in my life. 

 I used to dream about her all the time during my 20's, 30's, and 40's. Eventually, the dreams tapered off and stopped coming. My heart learned to heal itself. Puppy Love is a mysterious, splendored thing. I keep telling myself that I must constantly work on myself, physically, intellectually, and financially, in order not to sully the mystery and the splendor. Put it crudely, if an individual cannot respect and love himself, nobody else would either. 

You see, in my quest for Love, in the past I made a fool of myself, time and time again, but each time I learned from experience. Then one day I met a woman who truly loved me. A week before she died of a massive heart attack during dinner, she said to me, "Roberto, listen to me real good. Nobody loves you like your mother did in the past and I love you now. Nobody. You are not easy to love because you are difficult to understand. Stupid women would never understand you. They might be attracted to your looks, your body, and your mind, but they don't know what you think and how you really feel about certain key issues. And most important of all, take good care of your money, don't give it away to women like you did before. If you have no money, nobody, man or woman, sister or brother, would respect you and will definitely treat you like shit. Of course, don't be a miser, but don't be foolish with money. Stop talking about buying a Mercedes or a bigger house, and all that crap. Live simply and within your means. After I die, which I don't know when, but soon, I just sense it, you know I 'm blessed with having a sixth sense, by all means go out and date women, have fun but cling on to your money. Don't let any bitch rob you of the money you worked so hard for. Don't fall in love. A man your age and personality must avoid Love like a plague. If you feel lonely, get a dog."

Anyway, you, see Roberto, in my profession I've met many kinds of people. Some are so fucking dumb and ignorant beyond imagination. But the funny thing is that they think they are smart and informed. That's so fucking funny about it. So fucking funny that I feel like puking every time I have to interact with them. And I wonder why these animals live on this planet. They don't contribute to human progress. They just pollute the gene pool. Yes, I believe strongly in eugenics. 

(To be continued)